I'm not gonna lie, it's been a rough month. I have felt further from God than I have in a long while. I know that he is by my side, I know he never left; but I found it hard to pray, hard to worship. Yesterday I was at church and a song was played, 'Break Every Chain' by Tasha Cobbs. "There is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain." I closed my eyes and began to proclaim this over my life.
God began to show me all of my chains. I was chained to things I didn't want to admit to. I was chained to fear, death, worthlessness, depression, and anxiety. I began shouting the lyrics "break every chain, break every chain, break every chain!" Pleading to God to break these chains that were holding onto me.
Through prayer, God opened my eyes to something... The chains were not holding onto me, but rather, I was holding on to them. Every chain in my life had already been broken; but I was too afraid to let go.
"I hear those chains falling" The song continued. And I dropped my chains.
It is clear to me that my struggles are not over. God is great, he can heal, but that is in his timing not mine. The ministry God is calling me to requires me to be on the battle field in order to fight among the people.
My struggles are no longer my chains. They do not define me but rather, they shape me. I no longer fear what I was chained to. Despite the bipolar and anxiety that I face on a daily basis, I. Am. Free.
I am free to worship. Free to dance and sing and pray. I am free to serve, free to love. I am free to be me. My freedom does not come through the image I see when I look into the mirror. My freedom comes through my life through God's eyes. What He sees is what we need to see.
Your beauty, your worth, your freedom will be found when you start to see yourself the way God sees you. Every once of worthlessness that you feel will quickly dissipate when you see your life through the creator's eyes. He spent so much time carefully crafting you into who you are today. Every detail that you hate about yourself he put there for a reason. You are perfectly imperfect and that is so beautiful.
So, the next time you look into the mirror, point out every beautiful thing about you. If you can't find more than five, ask God, his list will go on forever. Let go of the chains that he has already broken off of your life. He has the power to break those chains but YOU need to let them go or nothing will ever change.
Hold on tight, your heart is on a journey.
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